Charlie Sheen vs David Arquette

  VS  

Two celebrities are in the news here lately, David Arquette and Charlie Sheen.  Both are Hollywood Bad Boys….so I wondered which one would make a better spokesperson (as if I could ever afford an endorsement from either) for Smokes and Booze.

Let the contest begin

Acting Career -

• David Arquette-  Sharkboy and Lava Girl, Dirt Squirrel, It’s a Very Merry Muppet Christmas Movie, Buffy the Vampire Slayer and The Outsiders (TV Series in 1990).
• Charlie Sheen- Three and a Half Men (Now canceled), Being John Malkovich, All Dogs go to Heaven 2, Three Musketeers, Hot Shots, Part Deux, Men at Work, Navy Seals, Major League Series, Wall Street, Platoon, Ferris Buellers Day Off, Red Dawn
• Both were in episodes of Friends and the Scream Series.

Winner- Charlie Sheen

Women -

• David Arquette – Courtney Cox (Recently divorced)
• Charlie Sheen – Paula Profit (Ex, but have Daughter), Kelly Preston (Ex-Fiancé, broke off when he accidently shot her in the arm), Ginger Lynn, Heather Hunter, Donna Peele (Ex), Denise Richards (Ex, with two daughters), Brooke Mueller (Ex, two boys). <Ed  Note- This does not include the numerous strippers or his claim to a client of Heidi Flies>

Winner – Charlie Sheen

Vices -

• David Arquette-  Checked into rehab for treatment of "alcohol and other issues" on January 1, 2011, shortly after celebrating New Year's Eve
• Charlie Sheen – Do I really even need to go there??????

Winner – Charlie Sheen

Kookiness-

• David Arquette – Was a former  WCW Champion and appears on Howard Stern Drunk and Oprah Sober (isn’t that backwards?)
• Charlie Sheen – To many to list, so we will just go with his latest tirade (my favorite is where he talks about AA, transcripts HERE).

Winner – Charlie Sheen

Overall, it’s pretty clear that Charlie would make a great Spokesperson.  If anyone out there knows him, I would love to do an interview.  He had me at WOLVERINES, but sustained me with Charlie Waffles.

And to David Arquette……who cares that you had your first beer at 4?  I beat that by 2 year and have photo proof.  Take responsibility for your actions and Man Up.  Look at Charlie, you don’t see him whining about loosing THE BEST SHOW and all those women in his life do you?  We all know you want to get back with Courtney (why I do not know), so go begging back and get out of the news….or go whole hog and use Charlie as a Role model.

Cheers