As many of you know…I have the worlds greatest son, James.
For Christmas, Santa brought the family a box of retro candy (also found HERE on Amazon). Contained therein were Candy Cigarettes, plus bubble gum cigars and cigarettes.
James got hold of the bubblegum cigar in the flash of an eye (he is my son), but I was able to snatch up the others for a later date when they would be more memorable.
Me: Good evening James, I’m going to ask you some questions.
Me: How old are you?
Me: Have you ever smoked Cigarettes or Cigars?
James: NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I’m to young.
Me: How about tried candy cigarettes or cigars?
Me: Where did you get them?
James: The Wine Shop (He means Tinderbox Vino100 in Columbia)
Me: Which were your favorite?
James: Bubble Gum Cigars.
James: How long have you been chewing Bubble Gum Cigars?
James: 3 years.
Me: Are you an addict? (At this point I had to explain what that meant)
James: Giggles* Nooooooooooooo!
Time to break out the candy.
Today we are reviewing two kinds, both by WORLD CONFECTIONS Inc. -
Stallion Bubble Gum
Lucky LIghts Candy (with the red painted tip)
I must admit, the packaging was pretty impressive. The two boxes both could pass are off-brand European Smokes, one (Lucky Lights Candy Cigarettes) even had a cellophane wrapper. I guess that is why there was big lettering on the bottom that said CANDY…..to stop Hillbilly Jim from saying “$.25 a PACK!!! I’m buying 100 packs of these”. I also found it funny there was a blue “Tax Stamp” on each box.
Finally, for clarity’s sake, I want to specify that nowhere on these boxes does it use the word Cigarette. Instead, they are labeled CANDY or Bubble Gum respectively.
Me: So tell me James, which one of these boxes looks the most real?
James: (Stallion) Bubble Gum Cigarettes
Takes candy out of the box
Me: Which candy looks the most like a real cigarette ?
James: (Stallion) Bubble Gum Cigarettes. Can I have one now?
Taste Test (James’ Opinion)
Stallion Bubble Gum - MMMMMMMMMMMMM….Tastes GOOD. Lots of different flavors: Strawberry, Orange, Grape and Traditional Bubblegum. James favorite was Grape.
Lucky Lights Candy – Tastes “Dry”. No flavor, just candy. Not bad, but not as good as Bubble Gum Cigarettes.
Me: James, which one was your favorite and would you recommend them to a friend?
James : Bubble Gum cigarettes. YES!!!! I wish all the stores sold them.
Me: James, final question…..does the packaging or candy itself in ANY WAY make you actually want to smoke?
James: NO WAY, that stuff stinks.
The Winner is Stallion Bubble Gum!!!!!
There you have it folks……definitive PROOF that even though these candies are packaged and designed to look like cigarettes, even children can tell them apart and they don’t feel compelled to smoke.
I know I can sleep easier tonight….but not without a cigar and scotch.
Editors NOTE – There is no website for World Confections Inc. that I can find other than THIS ONE , however I did find a online storefront for them at Candywarehouse.com (HERE) and right there are the candies in question….and in BULK. I did laugh at the price disparity between Candy Cigarettes ($6 for 24) vs Bubble Gum Cigarettes ($19.20 for 24)….oh well, I guess you pay for quality :)